Taming the Life

Season-end Banquet: Do You Go?

2010-03-24T08:46:00.000-07:00

At the end of every season at the rink comes the banquet. For those of you who are not hockey or ringette moms, the banquet is a meal with benefits. The venue is likely a hall, the kind where wedding receptions (of the country variety are held). The tickets will cost you roughly the cost of a top-end meal at a roadhous-style restaurant. The kid will likely get some kind of memento with his/her team logo emblazoned on it somewhere. This memento will like be lost and/or broken within a year. The food will likely be decent, and the company will be as it was all season. So, if you had a blast with the other parents all season, ride the wave and head to the banquet. If you think you may blow a gasket if you have to see that woman one more time, pass. If your kid desperately wants to go, you may want to reconsider. If you think your particular kid will be bored, won't eat the food, or will become a menace to society within 15 minutes of arrival, do everyone a favour and stay home.

To sum up:
- The season-end banquet is not an exciting event. The people sitting next to you will make or break it.
- If the tickets cost more than you want to spend, don't buy 'em. You are under no obligation (unless you are the coach).
- If at all possible, take only the kid involved. And, involve that kid in the to-go-or-not-to-go decision.

4 questions that can help you assess your space

2010-03-10T08:35:00.000-08:00

Today I'm going to head into the kitchen and assess the space. We recently shifted our large kitchen table into the family room (voila: one fabulous dining room), shifted the family room to the living room (previously a more or less unused room) and created a breakfast bar in the kitchen. We turfed a couple of large, down-at-the-heel chairs. We feel like we moved into a new house.

My DH has suggested using the breakfast bar for storage with out of site access from our basement stairwell. I was charmed. There's a reason I like this guy so much.

Then I panicked. What would I put in there?

Stupid problem, I'll admit.

So, this leads me to today's little project. I'm going to take a good hard look at the contents of my kitchen cupboards. Everything gets asked the same questions:
1. Are you necessary or desirable? If I don't use it or like it, or (gasp) it's an expired food item, out it goes.
2. Do you belong in the kitchen? If this is an item that would be better placed in another room of the house, it is taking up valuable real estate for no reason. Gondee.
3. Are you as close as possible to your action zone? If I can move an item to a different location and save myself from steps during meal prep, baking, or dishwasher unloading, the change of address cards are in the mail, baby.
4. Are you easily accessible? If it is difficult to get to this item, find it, or retrieve it, it's time for a new solution.

Wish me luck!

This is Not a New Year's Post

2010-01-04T05:48:00.000-08:00

It's a Half Year post.

See, I have school-age children, and am of the work-from-home segment of momhood. So my "year" begins in September, and seems to effectively end with the waning of June. Sort of like a politician. Call it a fiscal eight months.

The crux of it is that we are a one computer household. I do the vast majority of my work on said computer. Children of a certain age spend a lot of time at the computer, whether using it or simply distracting the person who is using it. Ergo, if I want to get work done on the computer, I must get it done when they aren't around, or when they are asleep. Assuming that I need sleep too (and I do, or my brain may as well be Jello with shredded carrots in it -- useless, tasteless, and disgusting), school days are golden.

I'll confess that I don't think I made the best use of those golden days these past three months. Now, to do better. Make a plan. Tuck in all the fluttering edges of stuff that must be done and forge ahead.

5 Reasons Calendars Don't Work

2009-10-20T11:41:00.000-07:00

We try, as a family, to keep our lives simple. The parental types in the house do not belong to groups. I am a stay-at-home mom, and volunteer locally once a week. I also put in a small amount of time for the progeny's activities (one each, only). Family events are not so plentiful as to be overwhelming. Dental, medical and other appointments are all of a regular, almost routine nature. The calendar has plenty of entries, but not to the point of saturation.

But this morning, it didn't work.

Here's why:
1. I didn't write everything down. My volunteer time wasn't there, because I do it every week, and trusted myself to "remember".
2. I didn't look ahead, last week, to see what was happening this week.
3. I didn't plan menus for this week.
4. I didn't write down the appointment when I found out about it.
5. I didn't read what my eyes couldn't see.

Of course, the upshot of this is that it wasn't the calendar that wasn't working: it was me. Notice that all five reasons begin with "I". So, to make your calendar work for you, like an unpaid assistant, here's what you need to do:
1. Write down all events *as you learn of them*. This allows you to see conflicts early and deal with them. Whether that means cancelling one event, calling for help, or rescheduling, the earlier the better.
2. Check the calendar each week to see what is ahead. Make adjustments as necessary.
3. Plan menus for the week, using the calendar as your guide. This lets you plan a quick meal on the night you really need the quick meal, and lets you leave the elaborate meals to the nights with more breathing room. It also keeps you from all-night baking sessions to meet the social requirements.
4. Write everything down on the calendar. Once you become dependent on a calendar, items not listed on the calendar cease to exist. They disappear until they are upon you, and life suddenly seems far more complicated than it actually is.
5. Look at your calendar. Read it. Use it.

Is Laundry Ever Done?

2009-04-20T07:32:00.001-07:00

Well, no. Sorry. While you're doing laundry you're wearing clothes, drying your hands on a towel.

Producing more laundry.

Shift the focus. It is possible to finish a load of laundry. So focus on that. Have you washed, dried, folded and put away a load of laundry today? If you have, put a tick beside laundry for the day.

There will be more laundry tomorrow. But for today, it's done.

Easy Stock Recipe

2009-04-15T06:25:00.000-07:00

I remember after Christmas dinner one year, my MIL's astonished reaction when she discovered that neither I nor my SIL made stock...that we would let that turkey carcass go to waste. At the time my defence was that my time was worth more to me than the $2.19 that a Tetra pak of chicken stock would cost me.

I think differently now.

A. I make pretty nearly everything we eat from scratch.
B. I want my grocery bill to be as small as possible.
C. I figured out how to make stock with the smallest amount of fuss and time output possible.

Here's how I do it:

1. After the roast turkey or chicken dinner, I remove the meat from the bones. This is easiest while the bird is still warm; simply pull it off. Slice it if you like.

2. Even before I do the dishes, I cut up onion, celery, and carrots. These are the key vegetables for making a good stock.

3. Put the vegetables and bones together on a plate, in a plastic container, or in a plastic baggie (whatever you use to stash leftovers in your fridge). You may want to separate these into two or three batches, depending on the size of the bones.

4. The next morning, I toss one batch into my CrockPot and cover with water. I cook this on the low setting for about eight hours.

5. Scoop out the bones and the vegetables. Strain the liquid (I use a strainer lined with paper towel). This will leave you with a clear broth and very little of the fat.

6. Transfer the stock to ice cube trays. For me, one batch fills about five trays. Put these in the freezer.

7. Once the stock is frozen, you can either use it from the trays, or pop out the cubes and put them into a container or plastic baggie.

That's it. Simple, painless, and frugal.

Tournaments: 5 Tips for Parents

2009-04-08T06:58:00.000-07:00

If you have a child who plays sports, then tournaments are also part of your life.

Tournaments eat up time, money and peace of mind faster than a kid can get in and out of his/her equipment. But, there are ways to minimize the damage.

1. Plan your route to each game. Yes, this means looking at a map. Talk to other parents, too; they'll often have tips about reaching certain rinks or fields, parking, etc. Planning your route also involves padding travel time for traffic slowdowns, weather and human error.

2. Plan your downtime. This is especially important when you're on the road for a tournament. Online maps often give you the option to search the area for restaurants, coffee shops and attractions.

3. Plan your meals and snacks. Where are you going to eat? If the game is at noon, will you have lunch before, or after?

4. Plan to socialize. While the kids are getting ready, conversation with other parents will be your main activity. You may be able to stake out a spot in the stands early and get some work done, but don't count on it.

5. Plan your budget. How much will you need for meals, entertainment and gas? Are you willing to shell out for photos, trinkets, raffle tickets? (If you're not, tell the kids ahead of time. Much easier than a conversation in front of the raffle table.) Decide your limit, then take cash. Small bills are best. Get this the day before the tournament, from your local bank or ABM. Nothing is worse than looking for a bank machine in unfamiliar surroundings.

Surviving a tournament is not only possible, it can be fun. The key, of course, is planning. Make your game plan, stick to it, and you might just make the finals with your brain still intact.

Weekend Wrapup

2009-04-06T11:41:00.000-07:00

Backward

One of the kids had a tournament this weekend. The venue was about an hour's drive away, and the schedule for Day Two had a gap of some five hours to fill.

We were able to fill the time with a leisurely lunch and a low-priced movie ($2.99 a ticket!).

In between trips I managed to get a bit of baking and laundry done, but precious little else.

I'll post more about tournament survival on Wednesday.

Forward

I'm still working on the homekeeping routines. This week I'm going to try to get all FlyLady Kelly's missions done. We're in the kitchen, and the heart of my home could definitely use some attention.

I'm going to stick with the blogging schedule I set up last week. It helps to have a plan in place, rudimentary as it may be.

Weekend Wrapup

2009-03-30T07:02:00.000-07:00

Monday morning rolls around and my thoughts turn Janus: looking backward and forward.

Backward: The Weekend
As a family, we didn't spend any money on fast food. We had some entertaining expenses, but not crazy-huge. The rink season is drawing to a close, with attendant year-end parties and tournaments. The kids are unhappy about it. The parents all look more than a bit desperate for it all to end.

Forward: The Week
This week I'm going to work on scheduling my online time. So this blog goes to Monday, Wednesday and alternate Friday postings. Twitter gets two looks a day, ditto for email and the Books and Writers forum where I like to hang out. Blog reading shifts to an evening-only activity.

I'm also going to continue working on the homekeeping routines. This is absolutely necessary if I'm ever going to live in a semi-clean house again.

Menu Planning Day

2009-03-27T05:35:00.001-07:00

Well, it's usually Thursday, but yesterday a migraine hit, so...

Back to the subject. Menu planning sounds daunting. Figure out what I'm eating for the whole week? Sure thing.

Think of your menu as the foundation for your grocery list. If you don't know what you're going to eat, how will you know what to buy?

Here's how I do it:
1. I have index cards and printouts with meal ideas on them. This includes a couple that just say: chicken - try something new, beef - try something new.
2. I have dividers labelled with the day. I bought the lettered ones and flipped them. I have enough for three weeks, but at the moment I use just the first week.
3. Look at the calendar. All our events are on the calendar, so I can see when we need crockpot meals and when we might be away from home for a meal.
4. I go through my stack of ideas (starting with the ones I didn't use the week previous), putting cards on the dividers. I make sure I vary the meat and side dishes so that we're not eating chicken with pasta four days in a row.
5. I write down the things that need to come out of the freezer on sticky notes. I put the sticky note on the day divider for the day I need to take the item out of the freezer. This only works if I check each day! There's nothing like looking at the menu for the day only to realize that the chicken I'm supposed to roast is a giant ice cube in the bottom of the freezer. It happens.
6. I put everything I need to make these menus on my grocery list. Anything that I have in stock I get to cross off the list.
7. I put the cards and dividers in order and store them in a recipe box.
8. Check the box every day (see pitfall above).
9. Cook and eat!

Top Money-Saving Planning Tools

2009-03-23T06:47:00.000-07:00

Having a plan really can save you money. My favourite money-saving planning tools:
1. Menu. Yep. Every week I plan out what we'll eat for supper and lunch if there won't be any leftovers available. How it works: I'm never standing in front of the fridge at 5:30 pm pretending to decide what to make while actually deciding what toppings to order on the pizza.
2. Grocery list. You probably know this one. Make a list and stick to it. How it works: The list frees you from buying stuff that's in your cupboard and forgetting things you need. And you just know those forgotten things are another trip to the $tore.
3. Snacks. We always carry snacks and water bottles. How it works: If you never hear "I'm hungry" or "I'm thirsty" when you're miles from home, you instantly cut out those emergency snack buys.
4. Calendar. Seriously. How it works: I use my calendar when I'm planning menus. That way, I know when we'll be away from home around a mealtime, or breezing in the door when supper should be on the table. I can plan the days that the crockpot is on duty, days when a takealong meal is needed, or even a day when we can go crazy and pick up a meal.
5. Treats. Bet you didn't see that one coming. Sure, you've heard about all work and no play. But did you know it could save your budget? Plan ahead for treats. How it works: They're rewards for good behaviour, and we all need them. Without any treats, at some point you'll crack under the pressure and blow your whole system.

Moving in the Kitchen

2009-03-11T07:42:00.001-07:00

Every four or five years, we feel the urge to move house. This time it is definitely not happening. It may explain why I felt the sudden urge to rearrange my kitchen.

First I did a bit of plastic decluttering. Then I did a cull of the cereals, etc. Then I got them to switch places. Now I have my flour right where I want it. Too bad I didn't know it til now. I also shuffled my mixer from one corner to another and flipped the drain board to the other side of the sink (that one might be the toughest to get used to).

So now it feels a bit like a "move", with no heavy lifting or labelling or cardboard boxes involved. Yippee!

Better Homecomings

2009-03-09T11:01:00.000-07:00

Going away?

First, clean up before you leave. Get all the laundry done, vacuum, dust, clean the bathrooms and set out fresh towels. Do the dishes (I mean really, is this the time to further science?)

Second, when you get home, unpack before you sit down. Yeah, it's hard. I just did this. The pile of bags gave the impression that we had been on a major bus trip and everyone on the bus had left their baggage at our house. The kids were bouncing from sleepless nights, too much restaurant food and overwhelming joy at returning home. The cats were loopy from the sudden reintegration with domesticity. I was tired as an 80-year old woman's chest, and there were no fewer than ten new calls, all from one BIL. No messages. A neglected inbox. Who am I kidding? Neglected inboxes up the wazoo.

Still, I raced around the house, tripping over cats, and bags, and cats again. Tipped laundry into hampers. Emptied the cooler. Fielded food requests. Tripped over cats. Cleaned out the cooler (trust me: clean out the cooler before you put it away again). Heard about BIL's reason for thousand and one phone calls (it was good).

Then I looked around. Because I had cleaned before leaving, once Baggage Mountain was conquered, there was Nothing on the floor. Nothing! Imagine it. I went in to the bathroom. It was clean, and there was a clean towel hanging there like housekeeping had been there. It was like a hotel. But it was better: it was home.

First Step of the Journey

2009-03-02T11:27:00.000-08:00

Welcome to my new blog!

I'll be posting here about the ways I'm taking control of the elements of my life. From grocery shopping to exercise, from childrearing to housework, I'll grouse about how I'm working to live life in the driver's seat rather than as a passenger looking out the window of a high-speed locomotive.

This is my journey to the tamed life.